When I recently told my friend, Brian, what my next post was going to be he wondered if this blog of mine was just going to be a running account of all the things I can’t do or am not good at. I thought about it, and yes, yes indeed I think it is! I enjoy self-deprecating humor and I have plenty to work with.
Here’s the truth, I love to eat. I am passionate about food. I have such affection for how foods are like people; instead of the difference in skin, eye, and hair color – they come in various flavors, textures, and styles of preparations. But they also have such similarities. Doesn’t every culture have a noodle dish of some sort, a dumpling, a sausage, a dish requiring the searing of meat over an open flame?
Here’s another truth, I can’t cook (ok, maybe it’s I don’t cook). I have a short attention span so things are often left boiling over, burning, or just plain bad. Throughout my 20’s, the valuable marrying-off years, my mother feared I’d be a spinster as my domestic abilities were, at best, substandard. Fortunately for all of us, I married hubby. He’s not only a great cook but he thoroughly enjoys the processes.
Now all my friends are quite familiar with the reality of my limitations. They never ask me to bring any cooked items to an event if hubby is out of town. In fact, if hubby is out of town, I’m often invited over for a meal. I think they have a fear that my love of Spam and pork rinds will ruin me.
Needless to say when my friend Julianne had a great idea for her birthday recently, there was genuine cause for concern.
That’s right. I make six things: sausage roll, orzo salad, vegetable beef soup, spicy green beans, hot chicken tits (don’t judge, they used to be called special spicy chicken but hubby, the ad man, renamed the dish, rightly so!), and apple pie. What I don’t think Julianne hit upon is that I usually only make one of the six dishes at a time, ever. Her request was to make all six for one event. Game on.